With the kids all grown up, Jane and Eric went on a vacation last weekend, as they often do these days. After all, that's one of the perks of parenting adult kids… But this vacation was different from previous ones, and not in a good way. Intimacy became painful, due to the dryness Jane was experiencingdown under. So painful, actually, that she chose to skip it altogether. She couldn’t, however, stop thinking about her intimacy-deprived husband, which added guilt to her frustration.
Naturally, with the kids having flown the coop, there is more 'couple' time, and more opportunities for intimacy. Ironically, as it may feel at times, intimacy during Menopause may cause discomfort, which definitely ruins the mood, and sets a different tone.
However, vaginal dryness is a common physical phenomenon and it has a solution.
So common a phenomenon, in fact, that one in three women experiences vaginal dryness during her lifetime. Common symptoms of vaginal dryness include tingling, itching and discomfort during intercourse, which is usually manifested by pain during penetration. At its worst, vaginal dryness causes women to refrain from intimacy altogether, at times drifting away from their partners, all the while harboring feelings of shame, inadequacy and 'flawed' femininity, that further damage one's self confidence.
Vaginal dryness is a physiological phenomenon
It happens when the level of estrogen hormone in our bodies decreases—which can happen for multiple reasons and during different life phases. It could stem from using birth control pills, childbirth and/or breastfeeding, use of anti-depressants and of course, the most well-known reason–Menopause (which may begin as early as the age of 46!).
Oils and lubricants—a viable solution?
When 'the dry spell' begins, and intimacy doesn't "go smoothly," some women seek lubes and natural oils, like coconut and almond oil, hoping for relief. It might seem like an obvious solution, but the fact is that any relief is momentary only. Sure, it may be useful during sex, but since most available products do not address the root cause of the problem, their effect is limited, and sometimes even counterproductive in the long run. The best solution is one that reinforces the area's natural defenses by restoring and maintaining optimal moisture and pH.
Such results can be achieved by instating a regular grooming routine, using an intimate moisturizing gel with a pH level of 3.8-4.5, the spectrum within which the vaginal defense system is at its peak, ably fighting both infections and bad bacteria.
With a pH level of 5.5-7, most oils & lubricants may seem like a likely solution, but in fact are liable to offer momentary relief while aggravating the condition at large.
So we now know the "don'ts" – what about the "dos"?
First we need to establish a regular grooming routine to combat vaginal dryness, just as we do with dry skin in our face or feet. After all, we deserve to feel great and enjoy intimacy and intimacy during the 30 years statistics predict we will live beyond menopause. It is recommended to use an intimate moisturizer with low pH as well as low salinity level, which is free of carbomers (synthetic gels) and paraben, and doesn't contain hidden phytoestrogens.
This could be a great chance to rediscover intimacy…
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